The Menopause – Golf and Bridge or Salsa Dancing and Kite flying?
My friend Lucy was looking a bit forlorn when I met her for coffee. She had met up with several old friends recently many of whom were soon turning 50. A common topic of conversation was the shape of life in the future.
Many have children finishing secondary school and their home lives are changing. Others are thinking of retiring. Some are caring for aging parents.
It seemed to Lucy that most of her friends were planning to slow down their careers and take up bridge, golf and gardening.
Now there’s nothing wrong with golf, bridge or gardening but come on.... we’re only approaching our 50s! Is it not a bit soon to head for these safe, enclosed havens? I understand that these are activities that time may not have permitted during a busy career, but still……
Is it just a coincidence that so many people seem to suddenly love golf, bridge and gardening at a certain stage of life? Perhaps these are the activities that many couples find work best for them as a pair? Maybe it's a good way to meet new people? Or is it a bit like the coincidence that lots of people suddenly fall in love and grab a partner for life in their late 20s and early 30s? And hey, that seems to work for many.
But can you answer me this? Are we merely repeating patterns learned from our parents and grand parents or do tons of people really and truly consider golf, bridge and gardening to be the most enjoyable way to spend large chunks of time? There are other things you know!
How about a big blank sheet of paper and some fresh thinking – learn a language, get a new bike, start skipping. How about exploring your creative side – dancing, woodwork, water colours, pottery, ceramics, poetry. Have you always secretly fancied the idea of acting or dress-making but never dared. Maybe look at the world through the lens of a camera for a while? You could start fishing or birdwatching… the possibilities are endless.
And who knows where a new hobby could take you?
Maybe alongside the golf, bridge and gardening, Lucy’s friends could think of committing to try something new and out of the blue each year. It makes for great conversation and lifts the energy. Have you ever admired the sparkle in the eyes of someone who has found a passion?
I think we all owe it to ourselves to have a go at unearthing some dreams we buried along the way – fly a kite anyone?